Being Hutch again….

I am back to just “being hutch”.  I am excited, nervous, ready to go, ready to slow-an amalgamation of so many feelings about so many possibilities.  In other words, I’ve decided to retire to find a new adventure for the second part of my century.

Two years ago I turned 50 (and yes Virginia, 50 is the new 40!).  I had my first surgery and my first  real desire to have more time to live a different life, a slower life.  One where I could spend more time with my sweet, sweet mother who came to bring me lunch every day I was off.  One where I could spend a few days doing something special with her as a thank you for her time.

One year ago I turned 51.  My mother had her first surgery followed by a series of complications.  While I was able to spend a few hours with her here and there, I was not able to devote the days I felt she and my father needed and deserved.  Those days would have made their lives a little easier and I experienced a sadness I could not give these wonderful people my time who gave me days and days of their time.

This year I turned 52.  I realized my oldest niece is graduating from high school and I’ve only seen her at Christmas and the annual family gathering on Christmas day for the past 5 years.  I found out this year she is an extremely talented artist.  Why didn’t I know that before?  My only other niece is a talented musician and I have yet to hear her sing.  I have a close cousin who spends Christmas with my parents each year.  I just found out she has become a gourmet chef.  Why didn’t I know that before?  My brother built a garage several years ago and I haven’t been there to see it.  My sister became a gardener and I haven’t been there to visit her garden.  They are each only an hour or two away but I haven’t been able to find the time to be their sister.  My only daughter is living at home, but temporarily.  She invites me to do things weekly yet I say no many more times than yes.  What happens when she quits asking?  I hear my friends talk about shopping trips, lunch together, and girls weekends away.  I feel jealous I can rarely participate.

So I’ve decided it is time.  Time to be the daughter, sister, aunt, wife, mother and friend I feel I need to be.  I am blessed to be able to decide it is time to explore opportunities and adventures before I can’t for some reason. Time to accept it is the second half of my century.  Time to go back to “being Hutch”.

What would you do if you could stop and decide to change directions?  What excites you?  My adventure is beginning and I can’t wait to see where it goes.  Will I start a business?  Go to school?  Become a nurse?   Make jewelry?  Read everyday?  Run everyday?  Cook?  What about you?

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~ by beinghutch on February 21, 2012.

3 Responses to “Being Hutch again….”

  1. I wish you all the best. Note that garage has a bedroom/den upstairs so come anytime as long as you want.

  2. Enjoy it ALL Barb, you deserve it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  3. Good for you, Barbara! I turned 51 this year and came to Cville mid-2009 in search of new life – slower, more laid back, more art.

    Enjoy the 2nd half!

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